Today was Brady’s second day of preparation chemo here in Philadelphia.
Day one was long. We arrived at 7:45am and didn’t walk out of the hospital until after 5pm.
Today was rough, emotionally.
Brady is doing phenomenally well, but so many others around were having hard days. There was so much crying from so many places that is was hard for my momma heart to handle.
Eventually, I had to just get up in move around.
Chris was helping Brady navigate some homework assignments as his chemo dripped down through the tubing leading into his chest.
I tried to bounce and move my legs to distract myself from what was happening around us when my eyes focused on the building through the window.
Soon that building will be no longer.
It will be completely demolished and each part taken away.
Taking its place will be a new, state-of-the-art tower soaring into the Philadelphia skyline.
This new tower will allow for better and more expansive care of families and children traveling here from all over the world.
Families just like us.
But what hit me as I continued to gaze and get lost in thought was that sometimes the only way to rise is to be torn down first.
Sure, in many cases, you are able to just add to what is already existing.
In fact, “popping the top” on houses is becoming really popular in major cities across America where space is limited and you have no where to go, but up.
So they build on top. Adding floors and expanding their square footage by simply building onto the footer that is already existing.
But only perfect situations allow for this to happen.
Why? Because many times the footer of the building was never built to sustain more weight then was originally built upon it.
Making building onto of the existing foundation impossible.
So when you want to grow and expand you have two options.
One, reinforce the existing footer so that the now safely hold the expansion you are building.
The hard one.
The one you almost only choose when you have run out of all other options.
The one where you tear the entire building down, pour a brand new footer and foundation, and rebuild something far greater than what was there before.
So here was our son, sitting in the chair getting chemicals pumped through his port specifically designed to clear his body of lymphocytes in order for his T Cells to be successfully received by his body next Tuesday.
We have to clear out some of Brady’s normal cells to make way for the new fighter cells to come and do the job they have been trained to.
We demolish them, to build him back stronger.
I think all of us have been in this exact place.
Maybe we have a strong foundation and just need to push ourselves to grow a bit. To add some floors and additional square footage. The foundation is ready, it’s just waiting for more.
Maybe we purposely demolished a building because we knew it was the only way to create and rebuild something far better than what stood in that place before.
Or maybe the building was brought down, not by choice, but rather something else out of our control. And now you are standing in a pile of rubble trying to decide what to do next.
Do you cry?
Do you run?
Or do you rebuild?
Sometimes, it is all three.
Sometimes it is letting the tears pour down our cheeks while we take a run around the block. Knowing that the only way to healing is to find a way to dream of all the possibilities of what the future could be with a building far better than the one we had before.
Jesus had to die so that we could have a way to eternal life.
He let himself be destroyed so that we could be rebuilt.
The foundation is ready. Let’s build.
Building something beautiful,
“God did not send the Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.”